Dreaming
by KiteDancer
Summary: And then she was gone. He fell to his knees, crying wordlessly, whispering her name, hands still reaching. She was gone. Forever. Dead. Chad/Sonny Chad/Portlyn Rated T for suicide.
1. Chapter 1

**Yup, so welcome to my new SWAC fic. A new step for me, as this will be my first SWAC one, although I have more planned. Hope you enjoy it!**

Chapter 1

"_Sonny, please, don't do this!"_

_The small figure turned at his words, chestnut hair whipping and curling out behind her in the gale-force wind. Tears streaked her pale cheeks, hazel eyes shimmering in the bright moonlight._

"_Why, Chad? After all, what am I to you?"_

_The words hissed in the gaping space between them, the pain in them shattering the mental block Chad had constructed, breaking down his carefully collected image._

"_I'm sorry! Please, don't!"_

_Her lips curled up in a heartbreaking smirk._

"_Really, Chad? Really?"_

_The words were a mocking repetition of the ones he used to say to her so often, the ones that never failed to put a smile upon her lips. He fell to his knees, jarring his spine as he did so,_

"_Really, Sonny, please. How many times do I have to say I'm sorry?"_

_He knew the words were a mistake as soon as they left his mouth. The answer was hard and flat._

"_Never. No matter how many times you give me pathetic, dozen-for-a-penny excuses and apologies, it won't change anything. It's far too late for that now. You self-proclaim yourself to be such a great actor; surely just one decent apology shouldn't faze you."_

_She raised an eyebrow, surveying him coolly through now-tearless eyes._

"_Sorry. I'm so sorry. Sonny, please, please. How can you just forget, just leave me behind?"_

"_I hate to break the moment, Chad, but if I recall correctly, you managed to forget about me just as quickly"_

_He winced, the words ringing true in his head._

"_Sonny, I was stupid, I never meant any of it, Portlyn was just a mistake, nothing more."_

"_Oh, so was that what you told Portlyn? That I was just 'a mistake'?"_

_She took a step towards the edge, peering over the cliff and watching disinterestedly as the fathomless waves smashed against the dagger-sharp rocks. Chad lurched forwards instinctively, one hand outstretched._

"_Don't, Sonny! I'm sorry, please believe me!"_

_She ignored his frantic cries, taking another step, letting her toes hang over the edge._

"_Please, Sonny. Please, please. I love you, please don't do this!"_

_He was crying now, tears running freely down his cheeks. If his desperate words had had any effect on her, she didn't show it._

"_Sonny, please. Don't. I love you; I've always loved you, please"_

_For a glorious, fleeting moment he thought he had finally convinced her, watching with bright eyes as she turned towards him. He reached out for her hand as she turned, stopping dead in his tracks when he saw her expression, rooting him to the ground, an unwilling spectator. _

_A single, glistening tear slid down her cheek,_

"_I love you too" she whispered brokenly. _

_With her long hair flowing out behind her, jeans and t-shirt dirty and ripped where she had fallen, pale moonlight illuminating her in an ethereal glow, hazel eyes shining, she looked more distant, more other-worldly, more alien, yet more beautiful than he had even seen. And then she was gone. He fell to his knees, crying wordlessly, whispering her name, hands still reaching. She was gone. Forever. Dead._

He sat up abruptly in his bed, breathing heavily, tears running down his cheeks. He ran a hand through his honey-blonde hair, trying to slow his racing heart. Nothing. It was all a dream. He could have laughed out loud with relief. The door flew open with a crash, making him jump. His mother stormed in, dressing gown wrapped around her, face stony.

"What was all that about, hm?"

"All what?" He frowned.

"All that shouting! About some girl – 'Sonny', you called her"

She watched him, standing impassively at the end of his bed.

"Sorry, that was me. Bad dreams, I guess"

She gave him a disapproving glance.

"Well, please keep your thoughts to yourself. No one wants to be woken up by your childish nightmares, including me"

He kept his gaze down, a sullen look upon his face, flickering his eyes back up to his mother, watching as she ran her glance over the many photographs lining his bedroom walls; none of them his choice. Everything in his room had been hand-picked by his mother – 'helping' as she had called it.

"Chad, do keep that ugly look off your face. It makes you look extraordinarily unattractive."

"Oh, we can't have your darling son looking unattractive, can we?" he muttered under his breath.

"Not that you care"

"What was that?

"Nothing, mother"

"I thought so"

She gave him a final glare, before flouncing out of the door with a toss of her dyed, platinum-blonde hair. He fell back onto his bed, letting his hand drop by his side. Of all people, of all times, why only now did he dream of Sonny Munroe?

**If you're a bit confused, don't worry, as most things will be explained in the next chapter. I wasn't really sure how to write Chad's mother, but you know, I figured Chad would have gotten his stuck-up personality from her.**


	2. Chapter 2

**This chapter is much less exciting, basically my explanatory chapter. Things will pick up in later chapters though. **

Chapter 2

"Chad, sweetie!"

He looked up from the glass table, forcing a weary smile onto his face.

"Portlyn...Hi"

Pulling out a chair, she took a seat next to him, an aggravating pout plastering her plastic features.

"I'm your girlfriend, you know. You could at least say hello to me properly, Chaddy"

She spoke in an indignant whine, a tone that never failed to pull him into a sour mood. He gave an exasperated sigh, throwing his hands in the air with frustration.

"Look, Portlyn, I really, honestly, could not care less about how to say 'hi', to you of all people"

The raven-haired girl scowled, shooting him a rueful glare. There was a long silence, as they watched the camera crew set up, the extras milling around like confused sheep, as usual. Amateurs. A high-pitched scrape brought him back to Earth, as Portlyn dragged her chair around to his, placing her hands together in front of her as if this was some important business meeting. She looked at him expectantly.

"As I was saying, about Sonny...?"

"When did we suddenly start talking about Sonny?" he asked, body tensing. He had been trying to put this moment off as long as possible. She pursed her lips.

"Chad shut up, please."

He raised an eyebrow at her.

"Right. We can do this two ways. My way; the lovely, nice, simple, painless way, or your way; the stupid, senseless, idiotic, and downright painful way"

He leant back in his chair, running a hand through his hair. This had been their problem ever since Sonny had returned. To be honest, he really couldn't be bothered to fight against Portlyn every step of the way.

"Fine, what's your way?"

Portlyn smiled triumphantly, tossing her black-brown hair over her shoulder unsuccessfully.

"Ignore her. Block off all contact. MSN, phone, email, voice. Everything. That way, you can just leave her alone to get over it, and you won't be put through the annoying phase of having to convince her that what you're doing is right. It's a win-win situation – well, apart from Sonny, of course"

Chad said nothing, stunned into silence. He knew Portlyn was shallow, but to think up such a stupid, egotistical, selfish idea of that surprised even him.

"Speechless? I know, like, how great an idea was it? I mean, I'm amazed I even thought of it!"

"Portlyn, that has to be one of the worst ideas I have ever heard. Even coming from you. And I think that's saying something"

Ok, even he had to admit that the last bit was quite unfair. However, she had no reason to react as she did. Portlyn jumped to her feet, sending the chair crashing to the floor.

"Oh no. You did not just say that. That's it Chad! You're always uncooperative, uncommunicative except when you're insulting me, and downright rude! Anyone would think you're still in love with that silly girl!"

He pushed back his chair, anger crackling in the air between them, oblivious that everyone around them had stopped what they were doing, entranced in their drama.

"Well, maybe I am!"

Portlyn scoffed.

"Oh, don't make me sick! How could you prefer that annoying, over-enthusiastic, little tweenie to me?"

"Easily!" he retorted, his eyes hardening to ice.

Portlyn turned on her heel, black curls whipping through the air and stalked out, arms firmly crossed over her chest. Chad sat down heavily in his chair, glaring at the people around him. They jumped guiltily back to their work with his glance. Where had it all gone wrong?

New Year's Eve had been the happiest day of life; the day Sonny had finally become his girlfriend. A short nine months ago. Their lives had continued almost picture-perfectly. The initial disputes with their respective cast members over their relationship had died down almost immediately. For all that the two shows were rivals, their deep respect for each other overruled that when there was a strong enough reason to bring them together. Still, occasionally, there would have been arguments, rows, causing sweat, tears, and on one particular argument, blood. Then in February, everything had changed. Sonny had auditioned for the movie adaptation of some teen book called Noughts and Crosses, and had been picked for the part of the leading boy's sister, Lydia, or whatever her name was. The inevitable was that Sonny would have to spend six months in a set in Canada, filming. Six long months of nothing but phone calls and texts. It was bound to have happened; even a bond as strong as theirs could do little to hold together with six months apart, after only having been together for three. Simply remembering, simply knowing how much he loved her, how much he cared for her; how was that possibly enough? He wasn't like her, couldn't wait patiently, couldn't sit and watch as the weeks dragged on. Call him shallow, selfish – he was, there was no denying it. And then Portlyn had struck. Of course, it had seemed like a good idea at the time; with Sonny gone, everything had.

The twisted plot of Mackenzie Falls had thrown their characters together, and it had meant spending some time hanging out with her, talking to her. In most respects, Portlyn really wasn't that different to him. So, he had agreed to Portlyn's numerous conditions, after much deliberation, only later remembering that now he would have the impossible job of making sure that word never got to Sonny of their relationship. That was why their only meetings took place in the set of Mackenzie Falls – anywhere else and the press would inevitably catch them. After about a week, he had started to have second thoughts about dating Portlyn. She had turned out to be slightly different from his first impression. Now she had what she wanted, she set about making sure he bought her expensive gifts, got her everything her fickle, fanciful heart desired, giving him numerous demands, threatening to spill to the press if he ever upset her in any way. It was blackmail.

And then, of course, Sonny had arrived back, filming over, three short days ago. During those days, he had spent next to no time in anywhere but his car, his house, and the set. She was still settling back in, unpacking and coming to grips with being back in Hollywood. Soon enough, though, she would find him. Portlyn had her own ideas about dealing with her but all Chad wanted to do was get rid of Portlyn. But if he did, there was no doubt that she would waste no time in plastering their relationship all over the front page of the newspapers. There was no way that Chad would put Sonny under that embarrassment, break her heart so coldly. Thinking back on it, Portlyn's idea seemed to be the only way forwards that he could see now. The other paths only seemed to end in disaster. Yep, to put it simply, Chad Dylan Cooper was stuck in a great big rut.

**So, all in all, a generally non-action chapter. My author notes seem to be getting shorter and shorter with every story I write ^^ I guess I just run out of things to say, really.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Well, kind of annoyed that no one has reviewed, but oh well... For the two people that have, here you go ^^**

Chapter 3

Once again, Chad was sat at the cafeteria table, watching as the world moved around him. Portlyn's idea was becoming less and less viable. Despite his constant disinterest, Sonny still attempted to say hello, to strike up a conversation. He could always trust her to walk in through the door, to sit down at his table and obliviously chatter to him about something or other. He had almost come to the point of just giving up and telling her. Almost. And here she came, walking in through the doors, sitting down at his table and – nothing. No words. Just sullen silence. Had he finally gotten through to her? Wasn't she upset at all? With a clatter, she got up from her chair, striding up to the canteen, collecting her daily slop. Still no voice. Not even to thank the dinner lady. Although, why Sonny would want to thank her for cooking up a pile of rubbish still escaped him. Back down she sat, scraping her chair across the floor, saying nothing. He watched her carefully as she ate. Something wasn't right. Something wasn't there. Something was missing.

"Sonny?"

No reply.

"Sonny?" His voice was louder.

Still nothing.

"..."

"Sonny!" He was practically shouting now. Her head flicked up and she slammed her tray down onto the table, making it shake. Her normally warm eyes blazed, startling Chad into silence. Sonny stood up abruptly, pushing her chair backwards, squaring her shoulders, staring at Chad with a burning rage.

"Oh, so now you decide to talk to me, huh?"

He jumped to his feet, mind racing. Portlyn hadn't planned for this! Panic overtook him, and he began stuttering, the words falling over eachother in his haste to get them out. He had to say something, anything. Anything that would distract her.

"After – what – four weeks? Now, suddenly, because I've stopped talking to you, you're going to talk to me again? I never took you for a person like that, Chad. I guess I was wrong."

"Sonny –"  
"No, Chad, shut up! I don't care anymore, ok? You don't talk to me, I won't talk to you. I don't know what the hell happened when I was away. Honestly, I really don't want to know."  
"I..."  
"Don't say anything Chad. You haven't bothered to for the last month. Don't start now. We wouldn't you straining your perfect voice , would we?"  
Her voice was filled with spite, spite that Chad wouldn't have thought her capable of. Suddenly, it dropped to a whisper, a whisper that cracked twice.  
"Just leave me alone, Chad. Leave me well alone. Don't ruin it. Just leave me alone."  
A tear ran down her cheek, and Chad's heart froze. She wiped it away angrily, her red t-shirt staining burgundy.  
"Sonny, wait!"  
She shook her head furiously, running out of the room, covering her eyes with an arm, leaving a stunned Chad, one arm still outstretched. He sat down heavily. He had made her cry. Hehad actually made her **cry**. He hadn't meant for that to happen. He hadn't meant for any of it to happen. God, what kind of mess had he gotten himself into? Pushing away the only one he actually loved. Hurting, breaking, destroying. That wasn't Chad Dylan Cooper. For all his cocky remarks and comments, there was one person he would never hurt, one person he would protect. The same person who had just run out of the room, crying. That wasn't the Chad Dylan Cooper he knew. Then, just who was he?

**This chapter was kind of hard to write, so it took me much longer than it should :p I had lots of ideas for it and ended up writing just about every single one. Hmm. Ok. Let's say, 8 reviews and I will update.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Right, penultimate chapter ^^ As always, thanks so much for the reviews ^^ And lets say... 14 reviews and I will post up. Maybe less. I have the next chapter written, so if you want it quicker, review review ^^**

Chapter 4

"Sonny, stop moping around and do something"

Tawni stood in front of her where she sat on the sofa, hands on her hips. Sonny sighed, curling her legs up beneath her.

"Do what, Tawni? Go and say hi?"

The blonde-headed girl sat down beside her, shoving a patterned cushion onto the floor to make space. She sighed, rolling her eyes in exasperation.

"You like him, he likes you – so what is the problem here?"

Sonny pursed her lips, watching as Tawni curled a strand of hair around her finger.

"The problem? He just randomly decided to ignore me for what – four weeks ! Then, when I decide to ignore _him _he gets mad! What am I supposed to think about that?"

Tawni placed a hand on her shoulder, her voice patronising.

"Sonny, trust me on this one. He likes you. Don't you like him?"

She shrugged, her brunette curls bouncing.

"I don't know. Somedays I think I do, then another day he'll just act like a complete jerk! He was my boyfriend – I don't know what happened to him when I was away, but now he's back to his old, stuck-up self! All that time I was waiting for him, the days ticking by, then what do I find when I get back? He's suddenly no longer interested in me. Was it really that easy for him to forget me?"

Her eyes blurred, and she wiped away the tears.

"Sonny..."

She looked up in suprise. Was Tawni actually being nice?

"Please go and talk to him. Because I'm caring. And it really doesn't feel nice"

Tawni frowned.

" I can't believe I actually care about you...ew"

Sonny smiled, giving her friend a hug.

"I will, don't worry. I need to sort this whole thing out"

She got up from the sofa with difficulty, testing out her numb legs with a grimace. Throwing on a black jacket, she walked out of the dressing room with a grin on her face. Things were going to get better, she was sure of it.

"Portlyn, I don't want to do this anymore"

She narrowed her eyes, watching him where he stood in the middle of the room, eyes fixed on the ground.

"Look at me, Chad"

She took a step towards him, wobbling dangerously in her 5-inch heels. He kept his gaze on the ground, jaw set in stubborn defiance.

"Coward" she spat, the malice in her tone clear to the cast around them.

"At least I'm not a black-mailing schemer" he retorted, studying her as she recoiled as if he had slapped her. For a moment she looked as if she was going to cry, but she recovered her composure with a toss of her head and a smirk.

"You back out now, I'll go tell."

He looked up at her abruptly, the hatred in his cold blue eyes burning into hers.

"I don't care. I'm not letting you force me into this anymore. Sonny deserves more than that. And you know what? I do love her! So there"

His last words echoed around her head. She scoffed, eyes wide and incredulous.

"You love her? How can you possibly love someone like that?"

He raised an eyebrow, trying to keep his anger under control.

"So much more easily than I could love you."

The last remark shattered her image and she strode towards him, fury crackling in the air. Personality insults she could take – she got them so often. But fooling around with her heart was more than she could take.

"So you don't love me, huh? Well did you ever think that maybe it's a bit late for that?!"

With a last step she was kissing him, knotting a hand into his hair, his body too much in shock to respond. A broken cry from the door made them jump apart, looking around wildly. Sonny stood at the doorway, chocolate eyes wide, one hand at her mouth. In a flash she was gone, darting along the corridor with a breakneck speed.

"Sonny!"

He was already after her, a hand outstretched as he ran, desperately, hopelessly calling her name.

"Sonny! Please!"

Her sobs tore through the hallways as she ran blindly, the tears streaming out behind her. Just a few more minutes. Just a few more minutes and she could reach her car, could get in, could go, could go far away from here. All those hours she had spent, wondering what he was doing, if he thought about her, he had been off with Portlyn. Had he whispered Portyln's name the same way he had whispered hers, had he kissed her the same way his lips had touched hers? She choked back another sob. Into the parking lot, still running, still hearing Chad's voice echoing behind her, the voice that she wished she could just shut out, just lock out. The voice that never failed to put a smile on her face, the voice that had caused her to break down so many times, the voice that she needed, the voice that she hated. She slid into her car, turning the key in the ignition, feeling it stutter underneath her. Looking out through the windscreen she saw Chad, his blonde hair whipping in the wind, saw him turn, saw him stop as his gaze met hers.

"Sonny, please"

She could read the words on his lips, even if she couldn't hear them. Shaking her head slowly, she let a tear fall onto her lap. His stare followed her as drove past him, watching her all the while, unblinking, only to turn away as she became a distant speck on the horizon.

Her hands shook on the steering wheel, her shoulders trembled. Forcing herself to stay alert and watch the road, she took the nearest exit, the signpost directing her towards Angelos Point. It was where she always went whenever she felt her life spinning out of control. It helped her to stay focused, clear her head. The crashing of the waves on the rock calmed her, letting her gather her thoughts, reconstruct her carefully contained image. But this time she went there for a different purpose. So many nights she had cried over Chad Dylan Cooper. So many days she had plastered a smile on her face, told herself that she should be happy, that she was doing what she had always dreamt of, that she had good friends, a family that loved her. Yet, one boy never failed to send her plummeting back to the ground, never failed to break her dreams, and still never failed to make her laugh, make her smile. Until now. It was more than she could take. Her heart could only handle so much of being tossed about, dropped, raised back up. Soon enough, she wouldn't have the strength to keep up the image she held of happy, little Sonny. Soon enough, she would lapse back into the dark, introverted Allison that no one wanted to know. Soon enough, the comments would begin to drop, the insults would begin to flood, the torment would start again, just as it had done in Wisconsin. Nothing would change. She had hoped that moving to Hollywood would enable her a fresh start, a new beginning, a clean slate. But reality was that it would never change. As hard as she tried, she would never be Sonny. Allison was who she was, the girl she hid away, hoping no one would ever find her. And yet, as easily as breaking her heart, Chad Dylan Cooper had ripped open the wall she had put up, brought Allison Munroe to the surface. She couldn't take it any more, couldn't deal with it. She was weak. She was giving in.

**Just a quick notes - Angelos Point is completely made up ^^ I was going to use a proper beach but none of them seemed right, so I made my own. :p Thanks for reading, and please R + R!**


	5. Chapter 5

**So, last chapter - sorry I didn't post up earlier - my stupid laptop was acting up again -.- Thank you so much to the people who reviewed, it really means a lot to me ^^  
I won't waste any more time with author notes, so here you go. ^^**

Chapter 5

His phone vibrated in his pocket, making him jump. He took it out, the number on the screen unfamiliar. He pressed it to his ear, flicking through the TV channels as he did so.

"Hello?"

"Is this Chad Cooper?"

"Umm – yes. Who's this?"

The voice on the other end was panicky, frantic, unfamiliar.

"It's Connie Munroe – Allison's mother."

Allison? Who was Allison? Did he know an Allison?

"Oh, I'm sorry, I mean Sonny"

"Sonny's mom? What's the matter?"

Why was Sonny's mom ringing him? Why not Sonny herself? Was she really that mad at him that she would get her mom to step in?

"It's just, Sonny's...she's"

He heard a sob through the phone line, hastily choked back. His heartbeat instantly sped, mind racing. Was she dead? Kidnapped?

"She's missing. We can't find her anywhere. Her phone's turned off, no one has seen her since she work this afternoon . She's never gone off without telling anyone before. Call me paranoid, but -"

The rest of her words trailed into a meaningless babble. Sonny was missing? Since this afternoon. Since she had seen Portlyn and him... Surely it couldn't have upset her that much? Could it?

"I guess by your silence that this is all news to you as well... I just thought that she might have said something to you – I mean, she talks about you so much... Has she called you or anything?"

He could barely move his lips, forcing them to correspond to the sound he wanted.

"No"

"Oh. Well, I'm sorry for bothering you..."

She was close to tears again.

"..."

"Thank you"

"..."

The line clicked as Connie hung up, leaving Chad still holding the phone to his ear, the TV remote still held in his hand at the channel he had stopped at, the 34 inch plasma blasting out the So Random theme tune. A wild notion grabbed him, and he flicked through his contacts, stopping on the Voicemail number. The toneless woman on the end of the line informed that he had one message. Pressing the play button, his fears were confirmed as Sonny's familiar voice greeted him.

She was crying hard, trying to speak through her tears.

"_Chad, I'm sorry._

_I just can't do it any more._

_I just can't._

_I don't know who I am._

_I thought I did._

_I was wrong._

_I was wrong about so many things._

_I thought you loved me._

_I thought you cared._

_I was wrong._

_So, it ends here._

_I'm giving up._

_I can't do it anymore._

_End of the line._

_I'm so sorry"_

Her sobs were abruptly cut off as the call ended, leaving him rooted to the spot. Oh God, what had he done? What had he done to her? Racking his memories for anything she might have said, anything she might have done, that would give him a clue to where she was. Just a few hours ago, when she had driven off, where had she gone? That signpost, the one he always went past, what did it say? With a jolt he realised, his heart stopping as the full implication hit him. Jesus, what had he done to her? She couldn't do this, couldn't leave him. He had to stop her.

Running up the rocky path, he could already see her, a pale shadow on the edge of the cliff, a flash of white against the inky darkness of the night. His breath came in ragged gasps as he ran, the harsh sound shattering the still of the night, his heart pumping a frantic rhythm. He couldn't stop now, had to reach her. He cried her name, the word bouncing off the rocks and disappearing amongst the crash of the sea spray as it rushed against the cliffs. Panting, he slid to a halt as he reached the outcrop of stone where she stood.

"Sonny, please, don't do this!"

The small figure turned at his words, chestnut hair whipping and curling out behind her in the gale-force wind. Tears streaked her pale cheeks, hazel eyes shimmering in the bright moonlight. The scene was unusually familiar. Why? Why did he recognise this place?

"Why, Chad? After all, what am I to you?"

The words hissed in the gaping space between them, the pain in them shattering the mental block Chad had constructed, breaking down his carefully collected image. Something clicked in his head and everything fell into place with a sharp intake of breath. His nightmare. So many weeks ago. The one he had dismissed, the one that had set everything off. He could remember the outcome only too well. He had to stop it, had to do something to convince her to change her mind.

"I'm sorry! Please, don't!"

Her lips curled up in a heartbreaking smirk.

"Really, Chad? Really?"

The words were a mocking repetition of the ones he used to say to her so often, the ones that never failed to put a smile upon her lips. He fell to his knees, jarring his spine as he did so,

"Really, Sonny, please. How many times do I have to say I'm sorry?"

He knew the words were a mistake as soon as they left his mouth, just as he had done in the dream. How could he not have remembered, have stopped and realised what he was about to say? The answer was hard and flat.

"Never. No matter how many times you give me pathetic, dozen-for-a-penny excuses and apologies, it won't change anything. It's far too late for that now. You self-proclaim yourself to be such a great actor; surely just one decent apology shouldn't faze you."

She raised an eyebrow, surveying him coolly through now-tearless eyes.

"Sorry. I'm so sorry. Sonny, please, please. How can you just forget, just leave me behind?"

Nothing was going to work. Something had to work. She couldn't leave him now, couldn't go, just as he was starting to come to his senses. Everything had happened far too quickly.

"I hate to break the moment, Chad, but if I recall correctly, you managed to forget about me just as quickly"

He winced, the words ringing true in his head.

"Sonny, I was stupid, I never meant any of it, Portlyn was just a mistake, nothing more."

"Oh, so was that what you told Portlyn? That I was just 'a mistake'?"

She took a step towards the edge, peering over the cliff and watching disinterestedly as the fathomless waves smashed against the dagger-sharp rocks. Chad lurched forwards instinctively, one hand outstretched. All this couldn't just be about him and Portlyn. Something must have run deeper than that.

"Don't, Sonny! I'm sorry, please believe me!"

She ignored his frantic cries, taking another step, letting her toes hang over the edge.

"Please, Sonny. Please, please. I love you, please don't do this!"

He was crying now, tears running freely down his cheeks. If his desperate words had had any effect on her, she didn't show it.

"Sonny, why?"

She glanced back at him, brown eyes burning with anger.

"If you don't know why, you really didn't know me as well as you thought. My name's not Sonny. It's Allison. Allison Munroe"

She spoke the words with conviction, feeling her heart fall as she did so.

"Couldn't you see, Chad? Couldn't you see? Every smile, every laugh, couldn't you see beyond that? Were you so blind to it that you really didn't see – or did you just not care?"

"To what Sonny? I don't understand!"

"Don't call me Sonny!"

Her voice was a scream.

"My name's not Sonny! Say, it, say my real name!"

"No! You're Sonny! Not Allison! I don't care what you think name is, you'll always be Sonny!"

Tears were spilling now, glistening, filling her brown eyes.

"Please, Chad. Just stop it. Just let me go. I don't want to do it anymore. I just want to give up."

"You can't give up! Not now! Not now! Sonny, please, come back with me. I need you."

More tears fell.

"I need you, Sonny. "

She shook her head, the movement fierce, sharp.

"You don't need me. You'll be fine. You've got things to live for. You're strong"

"Sonny, please. Don't. I love you; I've always loved you, please"

For a glorious, fleeting moment he thought he had finally convinced her, watching with bright eyes as she turned towards him. He reached out for her hand as she turned, stopping dead in his tracks when he saw her expression, rooting him to the ground, an unwilling spectator.

A single, glistening tear slid down her cheek.

"I'm sorry, Chad. I'm sorry. I can't go back. Not now"

He took another step forward.

"You can always go back, Sonny. Come back with me. Back to where we were before. Just you and me against the world. Together"

She closed her eyes.

"Stop it. I have to do this. I have to"

He was abruptly angry.

"No, you don't! You don't have to! Stop kidding yourself, Sonny. Wake up!"

A sharp, stinging pain spread across her cheek. Chad looked at her, horrified, then back at his hand.

"Oh, God, Sonny. I'm sorry"

She stepped towards him, a sad smile on her face, seemingly unaffected by his slap. In an abrupt movement, she was kissing him, furiously, desperately, as if she only had so much longer. A second longer and it was over, she was back by the cliff edge.

"Sonny, please. I love you"

"I love you too" she whispered brokenly.

With her long hair flowing out behind her, jeans and t-shirt dirty and ripped where she had fallen, pale moonlight illuminating her in an ethereal glow, hazel eyes shining, she looked more distant, more other-worldly, more alien, yet more beautiful than he had even seen. And then she was gone. He fell to his knees, crying wordlessly, whispering her name, hands still reaching. She was gone. Forever. Dead.

**Kill me if you have to :p I didn't want the story to be another one where everything turns out happy in the ending. I loved this chapter though, it was really fun to write. ^^ A huge huge thank you to: please-make-me-smile, xsonyourhands, N/a, SparkleInTheSun, bcargill9, making it to dawn, jbgirl412, FunLover101 and OpenHappiness, all the guys/girls who took the time to review this. ^^ I hope you enjoyed it as much as I enjoyed writing it. ^^ Thanks!**


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